There is so much more to picking the perfect partner than simply being drawn to a steely pair of baby blues or a picture perfect pout. The character that lies beneath is what will truly define a person and as such, any relationship they enter into.


A strong mental attitude could be the key to securing a successful relationship, be it from yourself or from the partner you’re looking to find, we’ve put together our top ten traits that we think demonstrate a strength of character worth ‘getting into bed with!’

1. No self pity

You won’t see any self-respecting guy/girl worth their salt sat around wallowing in their lifes’ woes or dwelling on how unfair life is. No, a person with a strong mental attitude will instead relish in standing up to any challenges thrown their way and facing any issues head on. This positive mental attitude will enable them to grow and develop with a sound self-awareness and feel appreciative of the experiences life throws at them. If something simply cannot be resolved they will take a ‘c’est la vie’ attitude and focus on meeting the next challenge whilst accepting life isn’t always perfect or fair.

2. Knowledge is Power

Those of a strong mind and character are also those that feel secure with the knowledge that they are indeed of strong mind and character! They will not themselves be intimidated or made to feel bad by others who themselves maybe insecure and weak. Mentally strong people know they are masters of their own destiny and have control over their own actions and emotions and can respond to life’s challenges accordingly.

3. Embrace Change

Those people that love a challenge and are always seeking out the next opportunity are invariably the type of people that will make a great partner to hold your hand on life’s ever changing journey. They will thrive on adventure and rather than feeling fear of the road ahead will feel energized by the uncertainty of what the future may hold.

4. Accept not everything is controllable

There has to be an acceptance that in life, there will be things that are simply beyond our control, that no matter how much we want to, we can’t change. It is a great characteristic for a person to have the ability to recognise this fact. Who wants to be with a partner that wastes their (and consequently YOUR) time and energy trying to undo the impossible. The real strength of a person lies in being able to accept a poor situation that they know they can’t control and move on.

5. Don’t be a People Pleaser

A sure sign of an insecure person is one that constantly strives to please others and spends too many wasted hours wondering how they may or may not be feeling. Equally a person who behaves in the opposite manner by making others feel worse just to make themselves feel better and more powerful. A person with mental strength will have a self-contentment that means they can behave in a kind and fair manner whilst also being able to speak their own mind without the fear of causing unnecessary grief to someone.

6. Live Life

As much as we need to have an awareness of the past and acknowledge that it has helped shape us into the people we are, we must be careful not to live in the past and get stuck reminiscing about how great things may have been for us then. There is no point wasting mental energy reliving fantastic past adventures, instead we need to invest our minds and our energies on building an equally great future. Equally, for those with negative past experiences, a person with a strong mind would not wallow in these and blame them for life not going in the direction they wanted it to. Positive or negative, a person who can accept their past experiences and use them as a springboard to moving their life onwards and upwards is the type of person we should aspire to be, or be with!

7. Live and Learn

Strong people will only make the same mistake once over. They won’t repeat their actions hoping to get a different outcome, rather they will reflect on what went wrong, how they played their part and then learn from it. This ability demonstrates a great trait in a person and you can be sure in a relationship they would not deflect responsibility away from their actions.

8. Be Happy for Others

Resentment and jealousy are not attractive qualities in a person and it takes a real strength of character to be able to celebrate others success with genuine positive emotion. Be it professionally or personally a strong minded person will realise they can achieve all their own goals and ambitions with hard work and a bit of dedication and so will not be eaten up by bitterness towards others being successful in that particular area.

9. Don’t give up

‘If at first you don’t succeed, try try again’ – strong minded people will adhere to this motto religiously. A great characteristic to bring to a relationship, it will help ensure no one gives up too easily when things get challenging.

10. Happy to be alone

No matter if you’re looking for a partner or if you’re hoping to be a great partnership offering yourself, ironic as it may sound the ability for someone to be comfortable and indeed happy with their own company should be a pre requisite. It shows a lack of dependency on other people to bring happiness and security. It shows independence which is the key to any successful pairing.