Why Some Women Are So Difficult to Love

I’m a laid back man with a big heart who has often found some women extremely confusing. I have dated a lot of women and the ones I have found the most interesting while in a relationship are the ones who act like they don’t want to be loved when it is clear to me, that’s exactly what they need. I often wondered why these women behaved this way in the early stages of the relationship but then seemed to change and grow into the relationship and even into falling in love after spending more time with me.


I decided I would try to find out. Eventually some of these women have opened up to me enough to make me realise that all they are really doing is trying to protect themselves. They have shared some of the reasons why they have to do this (usually it involves a scumbag from their past). I have to say at this point that not all men are the same and we are not all bad. It is the bad few that ruin it for the rest of us though;

1. Men who cheat.

2. Men who lie.

3. Men who are emotionally abusive.

4. Men who are physically abusive.

5. Men who are selfish.

The list above my read as pretty straight forward reasons but the damage these things can do can make some women shut down, some times for ever.


They feel like if someone they loved and trusted could hurt them so badly, how can they trust anyone? They doubt their own judgement and are so scared they’ll put their trust in the wrong man again that although they think they like you, they also think that they probably shouldn’t.

My advice to any other man who meets a woman who is intriguing in this way would be to tell then they should know that she is probably worth the patience he will need to help her trust him. As we all know true trust is the backbone to a healthy loving relationship.

The steps a man in this situation should take to get this woman to warm up to him and relax a little are as follows;

1. Don’t be pushy

2. Be patient

3. Listen carefully when she speaks

4. Be patient

5. Help to raise her confidence

6. Be patient with her

7. Don’t mess up

So there it is. Take my advice men, if you follow the steps above you’ll find she’s definitely worth it.

By Hannah Jones

Hannah is a Manchester based writer who has spent many years studying and working in the field of journalism and psychology. Hannah enjoys swimming, meditation and dog walking. Her favourite quote is, 'If it doesn't challenge you, it doesn't change you.'